


Middle Man

by George_Hale



Category: The X-Files
Genre: Birthday Cake, Birthday Sex, F/M, Handcuffs, Resolved Sexual Tension
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-09-08
Updated: 2020-09-08
Packaged: 2021-03-07 02:02:26
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,987
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26359162
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/George_Hale/pseuds/George_Hale
Summary: Walter Skinner is celebrating his forty-fifth birthday. After a thoughtful gift brings on a wave of nostalgia, Skinner decides to go out looking for some fun.A decision brought on by a looming mid-life crisis almost spells disaster for his evening and career.Luckily, Dana Scully saves the day and ensures that Walter Skinner has a very happy birthday.Spoilers - Avatar
Relationships: Dana Scully/Walter Skinner
Kudos: 20





	Middle Man

**Author's Note:**

> 'And if you say to me tomorrow, oh what fun it all would be.  
> Then what's to stop us, pretty baby. But What Is And What Should Never Be.'
> 
> 'What Is And What Should Never Be' - Led Zeppelin

It was an average Wednesday at the bureau -Walter Skinner would have forgotten it was his forty-fifth birthday if his brother hadn't phoned him up in the middle of the afternoon.

'We've just touched down. Sylvie and the girls are in Washington DC with me, and we're hoping you'll join us for dinner tonight? You must know where a man can find a real steak, right?' Lyle pressed.

Skinner smiled at the question. It had been a long time since he'd looked forward to the end of a workday - that alone felt like a gift.

Skinner decided to walk to the restaurant that evening. He was looking to have a few drinks to celebrate this particular milestone. It only seemed right - he considered it damage control.

'Walter! And how's forty-five treating you so far?' Lyle demanded cheerfully, standing up from the table, slapping his younger brother on the back and shaking his hand.

Lyle's wife Sylvie and their two daughters, Robin and Cindy, looked up as he greeted Walter.

Cindy was contentedly tucking into a bowl of macaroni and cheese when her uncle greeted her. She grinned at him and nodded when he observed that she'd grown again.

'You haven't been waiting too long, I hope?' Walter asked as he kissed Sylvie on the cheek in greeting.

'Not at all, Walter - Cindy was just hungry, so we thought we'd let her order first' Sylvie assured him as they all took a seat.

When the table had ordered their meals for the evening, Lyle got in rounds of drinks, and Walter asked how his job on the oil rig was.

'It's pretty good. I don't like the long stretches, but I get a warm welcome when I get home.'

'I miss him so much when he's away' Sylvie confessed, Walter nodded - understanding and more than slightly jealous. Being in the presence of true love made him feel so solitary.

'How's work at the bureau, then?'

'Not many changes' he admitted, reaching for enthusiasm and falling short.

'Except your age' Lyle provided helpfully, getting a scowl from his sibling.

'Yeah, except that.'

'This should cushion the blow a little, brother' Lyle informed him, grinning as he handed over a large tall, rectangular box wrapped in gold paper.

'Lyle chose this for you all by himself!' Sylvie expressed, Walter smiled at the announcement.

'All by yourself!? I'm touched Lyle'

'I wasn't going to brag about that - but yeah' he admitted, self-effacing grin widening by the second.

After ordering a steak, Walter tore open his present and laughed when he found a Mathmos lava lamp in his hands.

'Wow.'

'Blast from the past, eh? Remember when we were kids - we had one just like that in our room.'

'We sure did - next to our record player.'

'I keep telling the kids that vinyl sounds better than CDs, but they don't want to know.'

'I guess you had to be there' Walter justified, smiling at the memory of his record collection.

He suddenly wanted those days back more than he could believe, how much simpler everything had been then.

Playing football, chasing girls and buying the latest records - the nostalgia this simple birthday present managed to stir up in Skinner was considerable.

The restaurant staff carried out a chocolate cake after dinner. They joined Lyle's family in singing happy birthday to him. He blew out his candles and wished he was seventeen again.

By half-past eight, Cindy was overtired and moaning for her bed, so Lyle and his family said goodnight and caught a cab back to their hotel.

Skinner headed home with the remaining birthday cake and his gift. He was there all of ten seconds before he thought better of it.

He didn't want to get an early night. He was restless, wired, and something else besides.

Leaving his apartment directly, Skinner decided as this was a big birthday he should treat himself to at least a couple more drinks.

The notion of grabbing a six-pack or some whiskey and heading straight back home seemed tame. Skinner decided to go looking for girls instead.

He knew a place a few blocks away that he drove by on his way home, it had a pink and white neon sign. He walked straight into this establishment known as The Glitter Factory and took a seat at the bar.

He had no fixed rules in mind for the evening. That fact alone made him kind of excited. It had been a long time since he'd done anything headstrong.

Still, this was not his scene, most of the patrons looked like they lived in the place and Skinner never got the appeal of being aroused in public - it just seemed weird.

He suddenly had a flashback to being sixteen years old and flicking through the pages of Penthouse magazine that his friend had stolen from his dad.

It's not like it wasn't exciting, but feeling that way in front of his buddies was awkward and inconvenient at best. He was still contemplating the come hither looks the girls in that publication had given him when a young, beautiful woman approached him at the bar.

She had pink and blonde extensions, a perfect smile and a bejewelled belly button ring. Yes, she was beautiful, but he thought that she would look better with less eye makeup.

'What's your pleasure?'

'Call me 'Sir.'' he requested, she seemed taken aback for all of two seconds before smiling.

'What's your pleasure, Sir?'

He smiled at her attempt to play along, secretly sad that it had fallen flat. It didn't work when just anyone called him that.

'You know, I'll call you anything you'd like if you've got the money.'

'I've got the money.'

''I bet you're important, aren't you?'

'Why do you say that?'

'Your suit looks expensive.'

'It was' he admitted, wondering distantly what his regular dry cleaners would think when they tried to get body glitter out of it this week.

'I'm just a middle man - I know how to take orders, that's all.'

'That makes two of us' she responded, settling down onto his lap, her sultry smile hit him right in the groin.

'I'll bet you do' he confirmed as her body started to work magic, she was young, firm - so ready to please him.

'So, what's your name, handsome?' she asked as he tried not to push up against her.

'It's Jim, Jim Messina.'

'Wow, that's hot' she responded enthusiastically, he smiled wordlessly again.

'I'm Destiny.' she purred as she ground against him hard.

'What are you looking for tonight then, Jim?'

'A party, I guess. Do you want a drink?'

'I can't do that while I'm working, I can be your party though' she promised, brushing her naked breasts across his face and grinding harder against him.

'I want to see everything- can I do that here?' he demanded then as she started to get to him fast.

She smiled at the request - then looked about herself as though sharing private information.

'You can see everything in the VIP area. I can give you a private dance there for an extra fee.'

'How much does everything cost around here anyway?' he demanded, she smiled again.

'It's negotiable - but $500 is generally considered an all-area pass.'

Skinner knew the smartest thing to do would be to bail on the spot, to take his money and inconvenient needs elsewhere.

'I can do that' Skinner told her as she gently tugged him towards the VIP lounge.

'You won't be sorry - you'll remember this night for the rest of your life' the promise was all the motivation he needed. After all, that's why he'd come here, right?

To prove that he could still make memories, he could have wild nights with pretty girls. He wasn't dead yet. This dirty secret would warm him on so many cold lonely nights, who needed regret? He'd deal with that and the hangover at the gym tomorrow.

He was stood outside the plush curtained area -counting the notes in his wallet and unwisely considering dropping the lump sum on his credit card instead. When somebody grabbed him sharply by the arm, he fought an instinct to turn and attack in defence.

Skinner scowled, swearing with frustration, assuming that it was a bouncer about to issue a stark warning.

'Scully! What the hell are you doing here?!' he demanded, staring at her in shock and confusion.

'I was at the bar. I saw that you were heading into the private rooms...' Dana eyed his youthful companion and his open wallet with distrust.

Destiny was looking anxious over this small redhead's sudden appearance - wondering if she was about to deal with a wife's wrath.

'What the hell is this?' he demanded again, his defensiveness and paranoia peaking.

Scully stepped aside to speak to him privately, and he left Destiny behind as he walked into a shadowed corner to hear her.

'This is a sting operation - we've been planning it for months. Any minute now Mulder is going to burst through the front door with backup and collar a mob boss that's getting a private dance. I was sent in first to watch him - I didn't think I'd find you in here.'

Skinner swallowed a hard lump in his throat at the clear judgement and distaste in her eyes. He silently considered how to handle this particular situation, Scully regarded his panic for all of five seconds before announcing.

'There's a back way out of here, go through the kitchens - quickly!'

Skinner didn't thank Scully, he didn't speak another word or look back at the half-nude woman who had been waiting on him.

Skinner walked through the bustling, hot kitchen, the staff exclaimed at him, but he ignored them, busting out of the back and running off into the night as quick as he could.

He felt like an idiot. He decided to drop in a liquor store on his way home, buying a fresh bottle of scotch and a case of beer.

Back at home, where he was safest - Skinner locked the front door behind him and then put the beer on to cool.

He laughed - a lonely hollow sound - as pieces of silver and pink glitter fell from his coat onto the carpet.

'I deserve this' he told himself as he threw his suit jacket down and put his face into his hands.

So Scully had saved his ass, that much was true. He was grateful for her help, even if he was hideously embarrassed.

Still, she saw him. She knew he was going for a private dance. She now assumed he pursued and slept with prostitutes and strippers.

Skinner poured himself out a triple shot of scotch and hoped he could drink enough to forget.

After turning on the fire and setting up the lava lamp his brother had bought him Skinner suddenly felt inspired again. He removed his tie and rolled up his shirt-sleeves before digging through storage and eventually discovered a dusty turntable and an old box of records.

Half drunk, Skinner cut himself a large piece of cake and carried it into the living room along with the entire crate of beer.

Walter sat down on the floor - he began to dust albums off and play them. He was halfway through Led Zeppelin Two when he heard a low tapping at his apartment door.

He staggered a little as he stood and then crossed the room, finding Dana Scully on his doorstep was a definite surprise.

'Scully? Can I help you?' he pressed, completely ignoring the look of chagrin on her face.

'I appreciate this is awkward, Sir'

'I won't deny that.' he observed hopelessly, gesturing for her to enter his apartment.

'Are you still on duty? Do you want a beer?' he asked as he sat down heavily on the floor.

'I probably shouldn't. I came here to talk with you - about what happened this evening.'

'Maybe this can wait for another time, Scully?'

'I'm sorry, Sir. Are you expecting company?' Dana asked being polite, eyeing her surroundings suddenly with some confusion.

'No' he told her heavily, he finished off his glass of scotch and then poured himself out another.

'I didn't mean it like that' she offered gently, taking a seat on the sofa that he was leaning back on.

Seeing him sprawled out on the floor, drunk and listening to rock and roll was strange - Dana had to focus hard on her next words.

'I know that outside of work we don't know each other very well.'

'Outside of work we don't know each other at all' he corrected her.  
Dana crossed her hands and stared at the floor as she tried to bring up the Glitter Factory.

'Despite this, I feel that it is my place to warn you.'

'I thought you had done that already?'

'What I'm trying to say is that if you're a regular in establishments like that, it's only a matter of time before you run into trouble.'

'I'm not a regular' he insisted, he drained his drink and set the glass down a little too heavily on the nearby coffee table.

'I've never been there before. I'd had a few drinks. It seemed like a good idea at the time.'

'Like Carina Sayles?'

'Who?'

'The woman you slept with when you were still married - the woman you ultimately jeopardised your career for!'

Skinner was a little ashamed to have forgotten her name. Nevertheless, Scully's tone was bridling.

'Yes, like her. She was a woman in a bar that was all. You didn't believe me then, and you don't believe me now.'

'I don't want to bring up the past. You said that you've never been to the Glitter Factory before, so I believe you.'

'Good.' Skinner poured himself out another drink and turned to see Scully watching him. She looked a little depressed and incredibly awkward.

'Then what else can I do for you tonight, Agent Scully?'

'You can tell me what you were paying her for?'

'You pay in advance in places like that Scully. You must know that much about Washington's seedy underbelly?!'

'I'm aware of how these systems work. I'm asking you honestly now what type of services you were looking to purchase from that dancer?'

'She offered me a private dance and said that if I paid extra, she would let me touch her.'

'That's what you were paying for?'

'Yes,' he admitted then, meeting her eye - acting unafraid but knowing he was wrong.

'It seems like there is a fine line there - would you have known the difference?'

'Are you asking if I would have slept with her too?'

'It's not any of my business Sir, but that would be breaking the law.'

'It would have been, and I would have seriously considered it, Scully, okay!? What do you want from me? Are you going to arrest me for a crime I thought about?'

'I suppose I'm just trying to figure out what type of man you are' she insisted then, clearly giving up on him and this entire conversation as she stood up.

'If you wanted to save me trouble at work then I'm grateful, okay? It doesn't mean you get to show up here and give me lessons in morality.'

'That's you being grateful is it?!' she demanded in return, clearly losing her temper at last and making him hang his head, suitably humbled.

'Thank you for warning me tonight. You weren't obliged to, and I know it must have been embarrassing for you as well.'

'I was just surprised to see you there.' she admitted, still confused and noticing him staring at the lava lamp now.

The wax had finally warmed enough to break free and start it's hypnotic, fleeting dance - she watched it herself for a few seconds.

'If you're not expecting company then what's this set up all about?' Dana asked in confusion. She felt that under the circumstances, this was not too intrusive a question.

'It's my birthday' he informed her, turning to see she had sat down again, her hands were in her lap and her thumbs turning circles.

'All the same, I can't condone what you did this evening.'

'Yes, I gathered that much' he responded ironically- she gave him a look over her shoulder - arching her eyebrow and secretly delighting him.

'Why did you tell her that your name was Jim Messina?'

'I was talking about Buffalo Springfield earlier with my brother...'

'That was your idea of a precaution, I suppose?' Dana responded, her voice dripping with irony.

Skinner found himself blushing, the fact that he was still capable of that was reassuring somehow.

'I'm sorry to just crash in on you like this - I should have called first' Dana stated. Walter shook his head.

'Let's just never bring any of this up again' he appealed, cracking open a beer, expecting her to leave soon.

'I'm also sorry that I ruined your evening' she reminded him as she stood up again.

Skinner shook his head dismissively as she looked down at him with regret and a hint of curiosity.  
He retained his position, propped up against the couch, taking hefty mouthfuls of beer.

'You didn't ruin my evening. I would be facing a world of trouble if anyone else had found me there tonight. I owe you one. Trust me, this is just a pride issue, and I'm a little drunk.'

'Plenty of men go to those places - it's not my place to judge.' Dana justified, only just meeting his eye, flushing a little as his eyes narrowed on her mouth.

'It was just a stupid impulse. I felt like it - that's all. I swear it's not a habit and I'll never do it again. I hope you won't judge me based on what you saw in there.'

'I understand why you felt the need to go there, isn't that enough?'

'Maybe not for me' he admitted, realising his feelings for her might be a factor here.

He was stunned when she suddenly took his face into her hands and kissed him. He laughed in disbelief as she knelt onto the floor to get closer to him.

Dana straddled his hips – breaking away from him for brief seconds to catch her breath- his eyes were burning for her.

'Where did that come from?' he asked, wondering if he was living one of his many late-night fantasies.

'I felt like it' she repeated his words, and he gulped when it looked an awful lot like she was willing to do it again.

Skinner pulled her in for another kiss and was shocked when she stopped to put his arms behind his back - before he could protest - she had cuffed him.

'If you're good then I'll take them off before I leave' she told him archly, kissing him deeply again.

He melted into the kiss, feeling her pressed close to him was making his heartbeat out of his chest.

'I want to see you.' he moaned as she pulled back long enough to unbutton her blouse. She teased him with a satisfied smile as she slowly slipped off her bra. His groan of acknowledgement had her wet and ready for him.

'I don't know if you've noticed, but you're not in the position to make any more demands, Skinner.' Dana told him, laughing throatily and biting his ear lobe when she heard the cuffs popping frantically behind his back.

Dana worked his shirt open - wanting to see more flesh before they went any further.

She whined in frustration when she found he was wearing a thin white undershirt. Skinner gasped - genuinely shocked when she managed to tear the bottom and rip the garment in half with one swift motion.

Walter laughed in disbelief again, and Dana shrugged, a little embarrassed at her impatience and the shock on her bosses face.

'I'll buy you a new one' she insisted, kissing him again - they both laughed together this time.

It was gratifying, the way she was looking him over. The irony hit home, as she ran her eyes and hands over his chest.  
His quest for validation had ended with the woman he wanted above all others openly objectifying him.

Skinner watched, panting with hunger, eyes glazed as she leaned up onto her knees and started to work on his belt and fly zipper - rushing ahead and pulling her underwear to the side.

'Don't stop' he ground out as she kissed his neck and hovered above him. He could feel her intense heat, so close.

Dana was poised, ready - wondering if she had it in her to take this already wild chain of events any further tonight.

'Lead me in' he grunted, loud, insistent, her pretty blue eyes darkened at the order. It seemed rude not to comply - and it was his birthday...

Dana had never felt so powerful or wanton in her entire life. Skinner looked like he would die if she backed off,  
so she sank onto him slowly.

Walter knew he had no more orders left in him, no more desires, no more wishes. She frowned in concentration, her face flushed - her lips rounded - he was solid gone as she focussed on accepting him.

They both needed a moment to strengthen their resolve against the weight of the moment. Skinner was tempted to burst as she gripped him tight.

Dana broke eye contact, bit into the flesh of her bottom lip fiercely as she rested her head on his shoulder.  
He heard her take some cleansing breaths and they both gasped, breathless with excitement when she finally settled flush against him.

Skinner longed to use his hands. Dana started to move above him slowly, again, taking her time.

Walter wanted to heft her breasts or grip her hips - he'd never felt so much desire for someone before.  
When Dana took control of her pleasure, Skinner decided that his lack of involvement was irrelevant.

She laced her fingers behind his neck, gave him a kiss that would haunt his dreams and then leaned back.

'Yes...' Skinner moaned helplessly, the view of her body making him impossibly harder.  
She didn't maintain the slow pace for long, she rolled her hips against him, just warming him up for what was yet to come.  
Then she rode him with abandon, sharing a feral smile when he worked hard to push up against her.

In the excitement of the moment Dana achieved her height quickly and brightly, Skinner felt forever grateful that he'd held out long enough for her to come first.

When he joined her, he was loud, the rush and the force of it all knocked him sideways - he gritted her name and let out a low groan of release.

Dana's vision was fuzzy as she felt the last tremors pass through her. Half-blind as she was, she could still make out Skinner's victorious smile.  
She identified with that, and she smiled back at him.

He worked hard to sit forward and kiss her - marking the end of their completion, bringing her warmly back to her senses.

Scully looked down at where they were connected, at Skinners torn undershirt, the bite mark on his shoulder - she blanched.

'That was incredible' she admitted as she righted herself slowly. Skinner laughed again, just having noticed that Dana was still wearing her heels.

After dressing swiftly, Dana noticed the nearby slice of chocolate birthday cake - she ran her fingertip in the frosting and tasted it.

Her hum of approval had Skinner feeling ready again, Dana re-dipped and offered him some. He took it without thought, sucking it slowly off her finger.

After removing the handcuffs, Dana rubbed his wrists. The impressions left there would have faded by the morning.

'Dana?' Skinner had no real idea where to start with her, but she cut him off with a kiss.

'Happy Birthday' she said, at last, walking out the apartment without another word.


End file.
